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Sigh No More

nick aldebaran

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#1 Guest_Kate Newton_*

Guest_Kate Newton_*

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Posted 04 September 2013 - 05:39 AM

It was happening again. She'd seen it coming of course. Anytime she saw anything but clear skies outside Kate was known to obsessively check the weather. She had to prepare herself for this shit after all. Though, really, there wasn't any preparing to be had. No matter how aware of it that she would be, it never failed that she would still be scared out of her fucking wit whenever a thunderstorm rolled through. There was absolutely nothing she could do about it even if she wanted to.

 

The fact that she was dealing with it alone was all the more painful for her. It had been so much easier with Nick there to comfort her through it. Not necessarily tolerable, but she could at least sleep through the night without crying her eyes out. He was her security blanket in those moments and she could easily feel more relaxed with his arm around her, with his attempts to soothe her the best he could.

 

Now though, now he wasn't there. Kate was alone that night. She was having to deal with this whole thing by herself for the first time in a few weeks. Since that first time he'd fallen asleep in her bed, Nick had comforted her through the thunderstorms that occasionally rolled through without fail. At first she would go in his room and seek him out, bringing him back to lay with her for the entire night. He'd gotten used to it after awhile she thought, because he would come to her. That was the most comforting thing of all.

 

But things were awkward between them now. So awkward that Kate had no fucking idea how to fix it. She'd ruined things. Ruined them by kissing him the first time and ruined it even more by kissing him a second time. And now, now she realized that Nick didn't feel the same way she did. Because as he'd stated, he couldn't do that with anyone he didn't have feelings for. It had been a drunken mistake and that killed her.

 

So, she hadn't approached him whatsoever. She'd gone back to her game of avoiding him. She hadn't seen for days, hadn't talked to him in weeks. It was straight to her room when she got home and she hardly hung around any of the shared living space if she knew he was there. It was pathetic, really, and she missed him. She missed him like crazy. But she was giving him his space.

 

That night she realized just how much she fucking missed him. And because Kate was a fucking masochist, she'd been sleeping in the shirt he'd left behind. She didn't move from her spot as the storm rolled in, shivering and shaking under her think blanket she tried hard not to cry but it was so fucking hard. And it was so fucking hard not to jump out of her skin any time thunder clapped. How the hell she was going to make it through the night without breaking down, she had no idea.



#2 Nick Aldebaran

Nick Aldebaran

Posted 04 September 2013 - 10:14 PM

Nick, on the other hand, rarely checked the weather. It wasn't until he was stranded in a class building without an umbrella that he even knew what the forecast was like. It wasn't until Kate moved in that he thought a thunderstorm as anything significant; normally he slept right through the thunder and lightning unless it was particularly severe, though even then he didn't worry. Such severe weather such as tornadoes were rare in this type of area (and common where he was from), so he wasn't worried whatsoever when the rain came in.

 

The ice scared him, admittedly. Having always been a worrisome, nervous person by nature, it went without saying that he'd stress out when ice covered the ground and it was time to drive to class. Neither did he skip class, so usually he left a good hour early so he could navigate the short drive without speeding or difficulties. He didn't grow up with ice; the few times wintry weather impaired Memphis, everything immediately closed. It actually almost kept him from getting an off-campus apartment the previous year, as he'd rather walk than drive through it.

 

Even then, however, he never checked the weather. It wasn't until he looked out the damn window that he discovered the threat-- or slipped in the ice and bruised or cut himself. That happened more often than he liked to admit. Either way, he was usually clueless as to what the day would bring in weather (unless Avery insisted on debriefing him), so he hardly expected a thunderstorm on this particular night. Neither was he prepared for it, but he wasn't sure if he'd ever be to begin with.

 

Again, he didn't fear storms, but someone important to him did. At first this was a bit nerve-wracking for him; after having fallen asleep in her bed he felt awkward and strange, but seeing that desperate look on her face the next time it stormed, he knew he'd have to swallow his worries. After a while it became routine; every single time he heard a crack of thunder, he was in her room in an instant. They spent those nights together, and he liked them far more than he wanted to admit.

 

But this time was different. The distant roll of thunder met his ears and he froze in his room, blinking towards the window. For a moment he considered erasing his mind of it. Attempting to sleep, putting on headphones so he wouldn't hear it-- but his curiosity overwhelmed him and he wandered to the window, pulling back the curtains to see an ominous sky. This wasn't just some thunder in the distance, this was an approaching storm.

 

Nick didn't go to her immediately. He sat on the bed trying to occupy himself with whatever he could find as the storm drew closer and closer, the thunderclaps becoming louder by the moment. Eventually it was right overhead and even he couldn't ignore the ear-ringing claps of thunder right outside their windows, and his stomach turned over as he knew what he had to do. Even if Kate thought he was strange, even if he'd ruined everything, even if she felt sorry for him-- he had to suck up his pride and open a fresh wound to comfort her. 

 

That was what friends did, wasn't it? And that was what he'd been trying to get past this whole time; he'd kept far away from her in hopes that he'd get over her. He wasn't eliminating any chances of being friends with her, hence stopping the mistake of sleeping with her altogether. There was no way he would've been able to recover after that, but now... well, maybe there was still a chance for him to. So staying away from her sounded worse than dealing with the inevitable pain afterwards, and he wandered down the hall and slowly opened the door to her room.

 

"Kate?" He called softly. "You here? I'm coming in." He clicked the door shut behind him and made his way to her, standing over her for a second as if questioning whether or not she wanted his comfort.


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#3 Guest_Kate Newton_*

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Posted 05 September 2013 - 02:11 AM

Kate had pretty much resigned herself to having to spend this night alone. She was going to have to grin and bear it. Much like she had in the dorms before moving here. The only difference here was that there were windows. A lot of windows, instead of the darkened walls where she'd lived before. The thunder resonated against them, sounding that much louder and scaring her that much more. Shit, she couldn't do this. She was going to end up having to hide up against the bathtub, curled up against that damn cat of Nick's that was always stalking her. It was the closest she could get to any comfort.

 

At the very least she was trying hard not to be pathetic about the whole thing. She'd kept in her room this time anyway, fingers curled around her comforter and legs pulled in against her chest as her breathing grew heavier and as she blinked back tears from the corners of her eyes. What a silly fear to have. Had she been in a rational state of mind she probably would have scolded herself for being so damn idiotic about the whole thing. Twenty and scared out of her fucking mind. It wasn't like she could even get hurt. She was inside after all.

 

But she was still terrified and she was still thinking about how nice it would have been if she'd had Nick there with her. It was so easy with him. Even if she was scared his presence made it so much easier to fall into a deep sleep and forget about the storm completely. Kate, too, had gotten accustomed to their nights like this. She, too, liked them. Something about sleeping in the same bed as him, having him nearby soothed her to no end. Really, that was one of the reasons she'd grown to care about him so much. The fact that he was willing to spend nights with her in order to help her get over her irrational fear.

 

As much as she tried not to think about Nick, as much as she told herself not to let mind wander, considering she didn't want to go down that route after what had gone down between them, she couldn't help but think about him. Couldn't help but stretch out her hand as if he would magically appear beside her to make everything better. She was met with nothing but empty space though, and she sniffled and shook her head at her own ridiculous actions.

 

When he called out to her, she almost thought the voice was in her head. Fucking ridiculous really, but she'd just been thinking about him and how much she'd wanted him to join her that it was easy to dismiss it as that. She was tired after all, and couldn't sleep because of the storm, it was far too easy to blame on her sleep addled mind but then he was right there, standing over her and she had to blink a few times to actually process that it was him and not some sort of odd hallucination. 

 

In which case she was happy to see him. As happy as she could be given the situation anyway. But even seeing his figure illuminated by the light outside only made her heart flipped over. God, she was crazy about him and it wasn't really fair. It wasn't fair what she'd done and how she'd fucked things over for them but she wanted to be so damn selfish regardless. She sat up, her mouth slightly open as she stared up at him. "N-Nicky?" She reached out a shaking hand for him though pulled it back almost instantly. "Um, you don't, you don't have to--" she swallowed the lump in her throat and sniffled again, shaking her head as she tried to formulate words. "You didn't have to come in here, I'm okay, I mean, I'll be fine. You don't have to if you d-don't want to."



#4 Nick Aldebaran

Nick Aldebaran

Posted 05 September 2013 - 03:35 AM

The closer he approached the more he regretted coming in here at all. Any efforts at "getting over" his feelings for Kate Newton were quickly becoming obliterated, though to be fair, he hadn't gotten very far in these efforts at all. In fact, his separation from her just made things worse; not seeing her every day made him miss her like crazy and dwell on the situation constantly. All he could think about was her lips against his and how stupid he'd been for almost going through with it. Or not going through with it; that thought occurred to him every now and then, as she was completely compliant with what was going on. Had he gone through with it... well, maybe some of these ridiculous hormonal urges would be satisfied.

 

He knew that wasn't true, though. He was crazy about her and that would only become exponentially worse by sleeping with her. Having her but not truly having her would be maddening, and it would only be a matter of time before she found some Kappa who was more her style than he was. He was dull while she was vibrant; he was geeky and awkward while she thrived in social situations and was fucking full of life all the time. They were complete opposites, and while it worked well with friendships, he was certain it wouldn't in a relationship.

 

Regardless, he knew time was the only thing that could possibly repair this. Distance. She hadn't ruined things like she thought, not really, as he was only distancing himself so he could properly be her friend later. While he wasn't getting over it quite yet, he thought he would in the future-- he thought that maybe he could move past it and they'd grow from it in a way. Best friends, right? Shit, she was closer to him than Brandon was.

 

He hadn't even talked to the guy about their current situation. Part of him was humiliated, as he knew what was waiting for him-- why hadn't he just done it? In a way he felt like a silly, overly emotional coward. Even Kate felt sorry for him, he assumed, and that only encouraged his need to be distanced from her. He couldn't bear to see pity in her eyes when he was just so goddamn taken with her.

 

But there was no use in repressing his urge to be around her when she was in distress. Who else would comfort her? Her sister, maybe, but it was fall semester now and she'd moved into a dorm. Brandon certainly wouldn't go out of his way to help someone like that, and he hated the thought of Andy being there for her for some reason. It made him ridiculously jealous, even if he regarded the guy as one of his best friends. So with little hesitation he came to rest beside her the moment she offered her hand, even if she'd retracted it, and while his poor heart went haywire, he pulled her into him.

 

"It's okay," he reassured her, shaking his head. "I'm sorry I didn't come in earlier." Saying it aloud made him feel like an idiot, like he was addressing the fact that he had feelings for her. And maybe that was a good idea, but he let the subject go like the coward he was. Stroking her hair, he reveled in the ridiculous feeling being close to her brought, though he couldn't help but simultaneously feel a sense of dread. "It's okay, Kate. Just slow your breathing for me. Talk to me about something, take your mind off of it." He fell easily back into their old routine, even if it was tainted with a bit of regret.


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#5 Guest_Kate Newton_*

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Posted 05 September 2013 - 07:15 AM

There was a part of Kate that honestly wished he would have stayed in his room. A stupid, ridiculous part of her that would have much rather gone through this alone than have had him near her. She'd been avoiding him for so damn long that she'd almost forgotten what it was like to be around him and even though she'd thought of him constantly, even though he crept up in her thoughts all too often and she'd realized just how much she'd fucking missed him, she knew that it was much easier to just keep her distance until she got over her stupidity.

 

But there was another part of her that was relieved he was there. Not just because of the storm, though that had a lot to do with it as well, but because he'd thought of her on his own. He'd come, knowing she was in here scared out of her mind. The realization that Kate had ben in his thoughts as the storm rolled through hurt her heart in the worst of ways. He was such a good friend, he was such an incredible fucking friend and she'd gone and ruined things for the both of them. Really, she wouldn't have blamed him if he'd stayed in his room.

 

He hadn't though, he'd come to help her and she was both upset and relieved about it. His company was always welcome even in this state of her mind, even when she wanted nothing but to forget about her mistake, to forget that Nick didn't have feelings for her, she was still more than eager to be around him. There was a heavy feeling in her chest as he sat down next to her and she immediately leaned into his touch, reveling in the feeling of being around him again. God she'd missed him so damn much it was absolutely ridiculous and now that he was there she didn't want him to go away.

 

For a long moment she said nothing though, only closed her eyes as he stroked her hair. She was still shaking, still jumpy when the thunder rattled against the windows but his presence was near calming to her and it was easy to get lost in just him as he sat there next to her. She shook her head as he apologized, sniffling again and she wrapped her hand around his arm. "It's okay, don't--don't apologize, you really didn't have to." Squeezing her eyes shut she thought about the way it felt to be around him and she hoped that he wouldn't take her words as her dismissing him.

 

Kate followed along with his instructions, attempting to slow down her breathing and not thinking about what was going on outside. It was difficult though, when the rain was pounding so damn hard and the sky was lit up every few minutes. Eventually she managed to start breathing evenly, and her trembling hands settled themselves. Still, she was nowhere near okay and as she tried to think of something to talk about per his request the only thing that came to her mind was how she was still absolutely crazy about him. How she wanted to kiss him and wrap her arms around him and have him stay for good.

 

The only thing on her mind was how she'd screwed things up and that he had no feelings for her and instead of finding something to talk about Kate started to cry into his arm, rocking slightly as her sobs took over her. "I--I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Nick, I didn't--I screwed things up and now we're barely friends anymore and I've missed you so much and I'm just...I'm so stupid and please forgive me, I just wanted to--I'm so sorry."



#6 Nick Aldebaran

Nick Aldebaran

Posted 06 September 2013 - 06:48 AM

This was much different than every other time he'd held Kate during a thunderstorm. The first time he'd been nervous in a way, sure; his heart thudded in his chest just about every time she adjusted during that first night. It took him a long time to grow accustomed to the way she fit perfectly in his arms, the way her hair brushed against his arm, the way her breath felt warm against his face. Once he did it was an easy routine; he liked it too much for his own good, but rarely did he feel any sense of worry for anyone but her. Now, though, he wondered if he was getting a taste of what she felt like in moments like these. Dread weighed on him so heavily that he could hardly breathe, and there was this strange part of him that felt restless, like he wanted to run.

 

But he stayed right where he was, partly out of friendship. Another part of him might have been selfish in that he wanted to soak up this roundabout affection of sorts, even if he was fully aware that this was only to comfort her. In a way, her being in his arms both soothed him and made things one hundred times worse. Stroking her hair felt familiar, relieving, but the notion that he'd have to leave when the storm subsided was always right there in the back of his mind.

 

It took him a few minutes, but he did realize that this shirt felt a little more familiar than normal. In the flash of lightning he looked at it a little more closely and discovered that it was the shirt he left behind. For a moment he wasn't sure what to think; his mind was blank as he stared at it in something like disbelief, his brow furrowing ever so slightly in the center. Why in the world was she wearing his shirt? The confusion that pervaded him was almost staggering; he blinked for a few seconds, trying to process what it meant.

 

It didn't mean anything, he concluded, forcing himself to forget about it. Maybe she wanted his comfort and this was the closest she thought she'd get to it, since he was being such a royal jackass after that night they'd had a bit too much to drink. Guilt might have hit him square on at that idea, and what she was saying certainly didn't help. He frowned, and while he wanted to pull back and look her right in the eye, he just pulled her in even more and shook his head.

 

"Katie," he said softly, unsure of how to proceed. He did need to get it off of his chest. Surely she knew by now; judging from her apology she felt sorry for him. Perhaps she'd realized then that he had feelings for her, he wasn't sure, but it wouldn't hurt to clarify exactly why he was avoiding her. "You didn't ruin anything." He meant that; she hadn't ruined anything by initiating that, as he knew fully well that it was all his fault and his fault alone. If he hadn't let himself get carried away with stupid feelings then none of this would have happened in the first place.

 

"It's not your fault. It's mine. Listen-- it's okay, don't feel guilty. I promise I'll... work past it eventually, alright? Our friendship isn't over." He finally did pull back to look at her, particularly as she sobbed, and he tilted her chin up with his forefinger in hopes that she'd look at him. Rarely did he encourage eye contact, but all he wanted now was for her to see that he was sincere. The motion alone felt romantic and he felt incredibly stupid the moment he did it. "I'm sorry that I was... some idiot who was dumb enough to have feelings for his roommate. It's not your fault, Katie."


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#7 Guest_Kate Newton_*

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Posted 06 September 2013 - 07:10 AM

There were entirely too many thoughts going through her head at once. It was almost overwhelming the way she couldn't seem to manage to concentrate on one thing, everything about this whole situation was overwhelming in fact and Kate was having a hard time calming down enough to stop fretting and stop crying and to stop being so damn nervous about the whole thing. Having Nick there was both better and worse. It was better because he seemed to be the one person that she could always rely on to soothe her through her worries. It was better because he was best friend, because he was incredible and kind and everything she could ever ask for in a companion. It was better because in these situations Kate felt safe when he was around.

 

But it was worse. It was worse for so many damn reasons and she hated them all. Somehow, she couldn't stop making things awkward and strange between them and she realized she'd done this too many times to count since having moved in. At first it was the fact that she'd been a bitch, dismissive and rude and accusatory as well and though they'd moved passed that pretty easily a slew of moments came after that like the bathroom incident or the fact that she was a fucking slob--how he put up with her and her messes in the bathroom she honestly didn't know.

 

It was worse in the sense that things had been so strained between them lately and she knew that was her fault. Anytime they avoided each other it was her fault. It was Kate who made things strange between them and now more than even things were so fucking awkward for the both of them. It was worse because she'd kissed him at the campsite, unable to control herself after being so jealous and angry about Brandon trying to hook him up with some girl. It was worse because she knew what it was like to kiss him and she couldn't stop thinking about how much she wanted to do it again.

 

And she had. She'd done it again. Stupidly, without thinking, except she'd made things even more strained by her behavior. What he must have thought of her then, she didn't even want to know. Already she thought that Nick thought she was...well...kind of a slut, and now, well, that was probably another one of the reasons he'd run off so quickly. And because he couldn't do that sort of thing with someone he didn't have feelings for. That, too. That thought never left her mind no matter how much she tried to shove it away.

 

It was worse because Kate was absolutely crazy about him and even something this simple like being curled up in his arms drove her insane. She had to fix it, she had to make things better even if she had to swallow down and get over her feelings for her. That's what she was trying to do at least, though she certainly was going that well considering the only thing she managed to do was sob her eyes out into his arm. And then he was calling her Katie and her heart was breaking even more than she thought possible and this whole thing was getting all the more complicated.

 

Kate had been bracing herself for the worst as he spoke, she looked up into his eyes ready for him to rip the proverbial band-aid off and she blinked back tears and swallowed as he spoke. For a moment she squeezed her eyes shut as she wasn't too sure if she could handle it but it was short lived as he hit her with the unexpected. She'd misheard. She had to have misheard right? Her mind had subconsciously twisted his words around to make them work out in her favor. That's what it had to be, but he kept talking and a bit stunned, Kate sat up and stared right at him. "W-what did you just say?" She sat back, pulling herself away from him and wiped her tear streaked cheeks with the back of her hand. "N-Nicky...you...you have feelings for your roommate? You...you have--I thought...I thought you said you couldn't..." Kate shook her head, completely confused. "You said you couldn't sleep with someone you didn't have feelings for, th-that's why you didn't hook up with that girl right? A-and then...and then you left I thought..."

 

She didn't continue her sentence, instead she stopped, looking right at him, tears still welling up in her eyes as she contemplated her action. Kate could only hope that she wasn't misinterpreting him as she shook her head. "Jesus fucking Christ, Nicky, we're both so fucking stupid," she laughed humorlessly and then she leaned forward, pressing her lips against his hard and hoping, just hoping that she'd understood correctly.



#8 Nick Aldebaran

Nick Aldebaran

Posted 07 September 2013 - 04:02 AM

The moment the words escaped his lips, he regretted it. While he'd been trying to put his feelings out there in the open so he could explain why he'd been such a dick as of late, he couldn't help but feel like it was the wrong move. Whatever chance he'd had at recovering and pretending none of this had happened was out of the window the moment he opened his mouth, and he only hoped that she'd understand and move on from it, too. There was still the possibility that she'd be weirded out and perhaps offended that he couldn't have a damn female friend without developing feelings for her. In fact, he had to wonder how often it happened with her, as he couldn't imagine someone being friends with her without this inevitably happening.

 

He swallowed harshly as she spoke and pulled away, feeling sick to his stomach. It was all he could do not to ask her to pretend he hadn't said it at all, but unfortunately it was clear by the anxious expression on his features that denying it wouldn't fly. Instead he waited for the inevitable, avoiding her eyes, focusing on his hands instead. Her confusion over why he hadn't slept with her wasn't something he expected, but he didn't bother answering quite yet.

 

It wasn't until she spoke again that he processed what she was thinking. Both of them were being stupid? He was only able to ponder it for a moment when her lips were on his, and for a moment he didn't respond out of pure shock. The last thing he'd expected from his confession was that, but here she was, and the implications behind what she'd said were finally starting to settle in. His lips moved against hers and automatically he moved in closer, wrapping his arms around her waist and momentarily forgetting why he was here in the first place.

 

This kiss was different than the others. It wasn't a release of a million emotions he'd been feeling for months now-- at least not as much-- and it wasn't distorted by intoxication. Instead it was sort of sweet, though still incredibly intense and passionate and electric, as he felt the kiss from his lips all the way down to the tips of his toes. He could swear his heart was about to beat out of his chest, and for a moment he utterly lost control of himself; it was as if he'd lost track of everything down to who he was in this kiss. Dizzy, he had to pull away before he forgot what he was going to say.

 

But for a moment he couldn't speak. He just stared at her, storm completely forgotten despite the flash of lightning outside her window. Blinking, he just allowed one hand to come to her cheek as he traced the outline of her face, studying it, memorizing the shape and warmth and everything about it. It was all he could do not to kiss her again. "Kate," he said, finally finding his voice. "I couldn't-- I couldn't do that not because I didn't have feelings for you. I just thought it would ruin our friendship."

 

He started to come down from the high that was their kiss, feeling momentarily confused as to whether or not she felt the same way. "You--" He started, intending to ask her what was on her mind, but he had no idea how to phrase it, so instead he let it drop. Perhaps she'd read his questioning expression and tell him exactly what he wanted to know.


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#9 Guest_Kate Newton_*

Guest_Kate Newton_*

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Posted 07 September 2013 - 04:23 AM

For a long time, Kate had only attracted a certain kind of guy to her life. She'd spent entirely too much time chasing after those who didn't treat her well, those who were, to be honest, undeserving of her attention and affections and she always ended up hurt and upset in the end. As such, she didn't have too much confidence in this whole aspect of her life. While she'd never been the one to think low of herself, the way things had turned out for her in her romantic life always left her wondering and she couldn't help but think that it was all her fault.

 

She'd never been the nicest person after all. In fact, for a large part of her high school career she was a down and out bitch and while she'd calmed down some after coming to Colorado, there were still moments where shades of the old Kate came back full force. There wasn't much left of that anymore, though she could still tear someone to shreds if she really needed to, but she still couldn't help but wonder if that's what had done it. Some sort of karma that had made her attracted to every single douchebag within a ten mile radius. That left her constantly hurt and upset because she'd been treated like shit.

 

As such, it was easy for Kate to think that Nick couldn't possibly like her. Aside from the fact that after their first two meetings they'd gotten along pretty well, in her mind he was everything she wasn't. And everything she didn't deserve. Smart, funny, incredibly cute and too damn nice for her own well being. He might have had some trouble with social interaction sure, he might have been abrasive and brash but there were so many damn unspoken actions that left her feeling in awe of just how great he was.

 

And of course she never thought she deserved it. The more and more she spent around him the more she knew that. Yet she still couldn't help it as her feelings for him grew exponentially. Had Kate not been put down and treated the way she had with the other guys in her life then maybe she wouldn't have thought what she did. That wasn't the case though and she'd dismissed her friend with Nick for just that. Friendship and nothing more. He was her best friend. He took care of her, he did things like this, watching after her during a storm or cleaning up after her messes in the bathroom.

 

Now that the words were out of his mouth and had clicked in her mind, it was easy for her to realize just how stupid she'd been. She'd been blind all along to the fact that he had feelings for her and the thought drove her crazy. Could they have been together long before? She didn't dwell on these thoughts too much though as her heart was beating wildly out of her chest at the contact. She'd been dying to kiss him again, the memory of their two other kisses constantly replaying in her mind and now that she was again, now that she was with that knowledge in her mind she didn't want to stop.

 

When he pulled back, her eyes searched his, trying to get a feel for what he was thinking of. Much like Nick, she'd almost forgotten about the storm, too, though her hands still trembled as the sky light up. But it was easy to lean into his touch and forget about it, easy to feel like her heart was going to explode as she listened to his words and she sighed heavily as everything sunk in. "God," she said, shaking her head and locking eyes with him. "Nick, I thought...I thought you walked away because you didn't--because you didn't feel the same way I did and I just..." She really didn't want to revisit that memory, no matter how much this one was outshining it.

 

"Shit, Nicky, I'm absolutely crazy about you. How did you not...I thought I was so fucking obvious. I thought you knew."



#10 Nick Aldebaran

Nick Aldebaran

Posted 08 September 2013 - 05:22 AM

There was something about this that was too surreal. It was hard to believe this was actually happening, particularly since he'd never even allowed himself to envision a scenario in which things like this were said. He was cynical by nature, self-deprecating; it went without saying that he didn't think in a million years that she would feel this way in return, as he thought he was lucky enough to have friendship to begin with. Allowing his mind to go there was simply torturous, so he wouldn't let himself do it. Admittedly he laid in his bed at night thinking about kissing her, but confessions of feelings? That was irrational. The only time his mind went there was in his dreams, when he just couldn't help it any longer.

 

Perhaps, however, that was what made this a little more believable in the end. Even his dreams weren't this good. For good measure he ran a hand through her hair as if to investigate whether or not this was actually happening, as he had a feeling his mind couldn't replicate the warmth and texture of it. The way her soft skin felt against his hand. He observed her, smiling lightly and shaking his head as he realized how dumb they both were, but he hardly seemed bothered at all. For some reason she liked him.

 

Sure, there was that worry that he wouldn't always have her attention. That didn't fade; she would probably find someone more interesting than him later on, but at the moment he couldn't be bothered by it. Right now all that mattered was the fact that she was in his arms, receptive to his feelings, and was it just him or was she basically begging to be kissed? But perhaps full on communication was necessary by this point, as that was exactly how things had gone awry to begin with.

 

"I've liked you since-- I don't know, a week after you moved into the apartment?" He said with a hollow laugh, though his face was lighting up in a ridiculous grin that he couldn't even attempt to suppress. "I can't believe you... I mean--" He considered asking why, but now wasn't the time. All he wanted to do was hold her and kiss her and be with her. "I thought you knew. I mean, my reaction after you kissed me-- surely that gave it away."

 

Nick wasn't much of a talker, but suddenly he felt the urge to talk about everything. To explain everything he'd felt thus far. "You know, I thought you just felt sorry for me. Since I couldn't sleep with that girl." He swallowed, shaking his head. "I thought that was why you kissed me, because-- because you knew I'd never done that before and you-- I don't know." Suddenly he was laughing and he squeezed her up in his arms, finally settling on the fact that Kate liked him. She genuinely had feelings for him, and not just in a friendly way.

 

But despite his urge to talk about it, there was just nothing else he could do to repress himself from kissing her. Somewhere in that embrace his lips found hers and pressed firmly against them, confidently, still a familiar feeling but different than all of their kisses from before. He wondered if all of their kisses would be different from there on out-- and it occurred to him that there would be more. There were questions brewing in his head-- like what this meant-- but he could hardly pry himself off of her long enough to ask.


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#11 Guest_Kate Newton_*

Guest_Kate Newton_*

  • Guest

Posted 08 September 2013 - 05:47 AM

It had been all too easy for Kate to be convinced that it was all one hundred percent one sided. They hadn't exactly gotten along since she'd moved in and even though they'd called a truce she still constantly remembered their first two meetings and how poor of an impression they'd made of each other. And honestly, it wouldn't have been terribly surprising as she wasn't exactly the world's most likable person in the first place. While she had a few redeeming qualities it had taken a bit of time for those to come out around Nick in the first place.

 

Even when they'd become friends she hadn't really thought so. She was just Kate. Superficial, not that smart with interests completely different to his. He was smart, really smart and far more level headed than she was and it had been so damn easy to like him and assume that he'd just thought of her as another girl. After all, she was sure that he wasn't a fan of the sort of person who spent entirely too much time partying and drinking and just because they were roommates she didn't think she was an exception to that rule.

 

Truth be told, Kate would have liked to think that she would have been perfectly okay remaining friends with him. That their friendship was enough and that eventually she would have gotten over liking him, but after the night of the campfire and the thought of him with another girl crept up in her mind it was all she could do not to think about it that way. She liked him entirely too much and it had been so damn unfair. She'd kissed him that night after realizing that he hadn't gone through with it and it had been so easy to assume that his response was just because he'd been just as drunk as she was. She shook her head, having a hard time believing this was going on herself but she reveled in the way his hand came in contact with her skin, eyes fluttering close momentarily as she enjoyed it.

 

But here he was proving her wrong and despite the situation, despite the fact that they were in the middle of a damn storm she couldn't think about anything but him. Her heart was practically soaring at his confession, too, and there was a bright grin on her face. "Really? I thought you couldn't stand me. I mean we didn't exactly get off on the right foot you know? And I know sometimes I'm not...that nice. Really?" Disbelief was clearly written on her face but she shook it off pretty quickly as she locked eyes with him again. "Yeah. How could I not? You're....you're incredible, Nick. Don't you remember me telling you I was in awe of you?"

 

Honestly Kate couldn't quite pinpoint the moment that she'd started falling for him, but she could always remember the fact that she'd thought highly of him. It really was ridiculous how stupid both of them had been, this could have have happened a long time ago. "I was so jealous. I wanted to slap the shit out of Brandon for even suggesting it. And when you came back and were by yourself I just...I felt relieved because I didn't have to think about you with another girl." Something he said struck her though and she looked at him curiously. "I didn't know that. That was your first kiss?"

 

Suddenly she felt terrible about taking his first kiss that way. Sloppy and drunk and then getting sick afterwards. But then he was kissing her and her arms went around his neck almost instantly and she realized that she had plenty of time to make up for that.



#12 Nick Aldebaran

Nick Aldebaran

Posted 08 September 2013 - 09:41 AM

His mind was so alive with thoughts that it might as well have been empty; he could hardly think of anything but Kate, Kate, Kate in those moments and in a way he felt like his heart would beat right out of his chest. Or that he'd wake up in his room, storm crashing around him, only to realize that none of this had ever happened at all. That somehow his dreams captured this scenario in his mind if only because he was that far gone about Kate, far past the chance of recovery. But everything was so real about the moment and he couldn't help but smile despite his hazy consciousness, and he had to remain in physical contact with her, whether it be a hand stroking her cheek or tracing circles around her hand.

 

For the first time he felt like he could properly stare at her without judgment, too. Like it was completely alright to let loose his feelings on the outside. She might have recognized a look he'd never really worn before except in short spurts, when she caught him off guard with something kind or cute or painfully Kate, really. A softened expression, heavy-lidded, nothing but adoration shining in his eyes. Now was probably the worst instance of it, and it was noticeable even in the darkness of her room. It was a look reserved only for her.

 

"Couldn't stand you?" He muttered in something like amusement, voice low. "You're one of my only friends, Kate. You know that. How could I hang out with you all the time if I couldn't stand you?" He laughed lowly, eyebrows raising. God, she was so fucking pretty even in the darkness and it processed that she... well, was she? Was she his? For some reason that didn't matter at the moment. The formalities could come later.

 

In awe of him-- at that moment in time he'd figured it was just his intelligence. Not anything romantic. For a second his expression was distant as he called upon the memory, and he smiled vaguely as he shook his head. "I thought-- I thought you just meant the textbooks," he said, but he dismissed it quickly with a wave of his hand. They'd been nothing but stupid, none of the rest of it mattered anymore. In fact, he was so done with talking that he just barely nodded when she asked about it being his first kiss, hardly bothered by the notion at all.

 

The thought occurred to him that he wanted her to be his last kiss, too, but he didn't dwell on it for long, if only because his mind was still so alight with thoughts. That and he just couldn't help but be intoxicated by her proximity; all he wanted to do was kiss her until his lips felt raw and then kiss her some more. Right through this storm, all through the night, holding her for as long as he could. He had a while, didn't he? Again, he wasn't sure of the formalities of this whole thing, as to whether or not they were 'exclusive,' but for once he didn't want to worry. For once he just wanted to live in the moment.

 

He kissed her deeply, never separating his lips from hers for a moment, arms moving around her to trap her there so she couldn't leave. Not that she would, he had the feeling-- by the way she was acting she wanted to be here with him. That thought alone had him dizzy and giddy and he smiled against her lips as he kissed her every now and then, though he still didn't pull back. He'd dreamed of this day for a painfully long time.


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